Monk Moisis the Hagiorite
In one of its hymns, our Church calls
the unbelief of Thomas “good”. Understandably one would wonder – is
there good and bad unbelief? There seems to be, because humans are not
purely good or evil. In one who has a clean conscience, good heart and
humble thought, everything is clear. In one infected with the virus of
unbelief, all is dark and troubled. If only we had the good unbelief of
the Apostle Thomas!
We would say that doubt, hesitation and little faith, it is normal to a man who seeks God with the mind.
The Apostles of Christ begged Him to add
faith to their existing faith. Unbelief, however, is a serious
spiritual illness. Faith is beyond reason and unbelief is unreasonable.
Unbelief is often dense, comes from frivolity and shallowness of
thought, and from a volatile life and confused consciousness.
The case of Thomas, who was absent at
the onset of the appearance of the Risen Christ to His disciples, is
typical. It is a fact that Thomas doubted, and did not disbelieve, but
asked for evidence to confirm his faith.
Well known for his enthusiasm in other
moments, Thomas is not a skeptic who is isolated and disadvantaged. He
dares, he searches, he investigates, he inquires. He asks for the truth,
to have direct contact with it. Christ did not have problem offering it
to him. He came back to meet him. He comes back to everyone of us.
The faith of many Christians sometimes
is lukewarm, colder than unbelief. We have faith as an armor and good
outfit to beat others with, but not to take the beating; to be
appreciated, admired and be watched. We do not dare to look ever deeper
into the beliefs of our faith, we do not in any way want to challenge
it, and perhaps expose it. Strong faith gives spiritual health, balance,
sturdiness, empowerment, hope and trust in God. Sometimes, let’s not be
afraid to admit it, our faith has much evidence of secret
ego-pathologies and morbid sentimentality. It reaches even to the point
of a mistaken belief in an antisocial skepticism, which offers a pretty
bad example to others. Seeking God while being this way, is to
backtrack.
Thomas surely was not of bad faith, nor
did he believe easily. He was careful, outspoken, genuine, solid, honest
and true. It was who he was. His good unbelief made Christ come to him.
Christ offered Himself to him for his sincerity. He did not rebuke him,
who asked to see Him, to touch Him. But eventually He blessed those who
will not see and yet believe.
Unbelief is of course a free choice of
each of us. Unbelief says that they base themselves only on what they
see and grasp and understand with logic. This is coercion and tiresome
easiness. Faith, we would say, comes with difficulty, hazard, risk and
daring. This is why He blessed those who believe without tangible
evidence. The strongest evidence is the confirmation of our hearts. The
hard-to-believe Thomas is our brother, he is weak, but definitely
sympathetic.
On Mount Athos this day we all have an
all-night vigil, because on such a day we were liberated from the
Turkish yoke. As we have learned, the world during the Paschal holidays
was more than ever in the churches. This means that faith is not
extinguished. But it can become deeper and warmer. Thomas is not for the
unbelievers, but for the skeptical, for those with little faith, and
finally for the faithful. May his good unbelief trouble us to fertilize
us.
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