Hieroschemamonk Julian (Lazar)
The
elder Julian (Lazar) is approaching the 90th year of
his earthly sojourn, brightened by his unceasing
prayer. For the purity of his heart, God bestowed
upon him the answers to many questions, some not even
pronounced aloud. The “Elder of
Prodromos,” as people with great affection call
his holy mountain, is the kind of spiritual father
who is more and more seldom found on Earth: a hermit
who weeps with you over your sins and unfailingly
heals the wounds of your soul with wise counsel and
prayer. A great agent of the commandments, he is one
of those men of whom it his said: “whosoever
shall do and teach them, the same shall be called
great in the kingdom of heaven” (Matt.
5:19).
He has a pure heart, which reflects the heavens like a
mirror, thanks to the goodness of his heart. When he is
joyful his entire face begins to radiate. It is a great
joy to find oneself nearby him then, because a feeling
arises as if you are sitting on your knees by a
grandfather with a snow-white beard, looking with love
upon the inner child of your soul.
And yet, although he has a “good heart and a
light hand,” according to Father Arsenie
Papacioc’s expression for spiritual fathers, he can
also be extremely severe toward your sins if he sees that
you persist in them. Even in this severity though (towards
the sin, but never the sinner!) his love for people was
obvious.
For the purity of his life, God gave him the gift of
always seeing (before you did!) where there is a
“crack” in your heart, the place through which
the passions penetrate into your soul. In precisely this
place, Abba Julian teaches you to apply the cure.
Together with three good friends I visited Abba Julian
in February 20141, and one
evening when we complained about the many earthly cares
and lack of time for prayer, the elder responded to us
this way.
Deification
—I see that you people are very busy and could have
much to say—if it was necessary to speak—but I
think that in this life it is important to struggle for
the life hereafter. Indeed, God gave us time and this life
so that we would come to Him prepared. We do not know, for
it is not given to us to know, neither the moment, nor the
hour when we will depart to the Lord to give our account.
After all, God did not create us without a purpose. He
announced the purpose already in the very beginning of the
Bible, in the Book of Genesis, 1:26: And God said, Let
us make man according to our image and likeness. The
next verse says that, God made man, according to the
image of God he made him, and nothing is mentioned
about likeness, because it should have been realized in
Adam.
Thus, the goal of our life is deification, because it is
written: Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father
which is in heaven is perfect (Matt. 5:48).
Prayer and Holiness
—We do not know what God looks like, as we read in
John 1:18, No man hath seen God at any time. This
is true, but we can meet with Him in prayer. Go into your
room, into your chamber, into your heart, and above all,
truly think of Whom you will speak, and then say as I, an
old man, teach you: "I thank you, O Lord, for leading
me to speak with You; me... the greatest sinner of
all!" And then stand and speak with God.
After all, what does He want from us? That we should cast
away from within us all the sin that defiles us. At
midnight or even noon, because we sin throughout the day,
enter into the depth of your soul and speak with Him who
forgiveth all thine iniquities (cf. Ps. 103:2).
And then say: "Forgive me, O Lord, forgive me, for I
did not know that they occur before Your eyes! I was after
all dead-hearted and did not think about You." Do
that throughout the day and learn to stand before God, for
thus will you cleanse yourself and prepare for the coming
Judgment.
And again you will see not only your smallness and the
abundance of your sins, but the also goodness of God, Who
desires not the death of the ungodly, as that the
ungodly should turn from his way and live (Ez.
33:11).
All prayers are beautiful, and it is good that you read
both the Book of Hours and in the Supplicatory Canon to
the Most Holy Mother of God. But if you have little time,
stand before God as I taught you, and speak to Him from
all the fullness of your heart. Do this and begin to feel
God! And you will realize that everything that you do, you
do before God!
And again, remember that when your prayers cease, then sin
begins! Even the cessation of prayer itself is sin.
Indeed, God said, "Be holy!"2 And I have never
heard of such a thing as saints who did not pray,. Even
the Apostle Paul said to pray "without
ceasing"!3 Without
ceasing—not from time to time.
In previous centuries, there were no priests, no churches,
no monasteries, just a community of believers amidst the
pagan world. The apostle told them to pray without
ceasing, and this exhortation also applies to you who do
not have time for prayer. After all, even those who lived
during the apostolic times did not know how much time they
would have for prayer, because they were always
persecuted.
Sickness of the Soul
—And now we look at it in another way: we are
departing for another world. We are dying for this world;
we are hurting both here and there... When something
begins to hurt us, we run to the doctor and take care of
our bodies. What about disease of the soul? Why do we not
take care of it at all? It may happen that your soul is
wounded and you do not know what it suffers from. When
your body hurts, you go to the doctor for a cure. In the
just the same way, when your soul hurts you should seek
solace and healing from a spiritual father.
—You see, a truly healthy person always has God in
his heart. If you have read Gospel of Luke 17:21, it, then
you know that there it is written, Behold, the kingdom
of God is within you. We also find another text in
the First Epistle to the Corinthians 3:16 that confirms
this: Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and
that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?
You see that Apostle Paul places a question mark:
"Do you really not know that God lives in
you?" That is, the body is the temple of the
Holy Spirit. The bodies of some saints did not decompose
and gave off a sweet fragrance because throughout their
earthly lives they glorified God in themselves.
Love and Mercy
—You know that "God is love." Indeed, in
his First Epistle the Apostle John writes that, He
that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love (1
John 4:8). And in Luke 6:36 is written: Be ye
therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful.
Love and mercy. Thus, this is what God wishes to find in
the heart of man—love and mercy. And if He finds
them, then in that heart abides His Kingdom.
Each man should ask, is the Kingdom of God inside me? Is
there that much love and mercy inside me? And if there
is—and of course there is, for God does not
lie—then one should ask himself: what kind of
thoughts should come from my mind, if I am the church of
the Holy Spirit?
Thus, the safekeeping of thoughts is a great matter in the
fight against the enemy. However, anger could not reach
our hearts if they are full of love and mercy, for the
Lord also says: Love your enemies, bless them that
curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for
them which despitefully use you, and persecute you
(Matt. 5:44). What sort of evil could afflict you if you
love your enemies?
You should know, however, that in the Second Epistle to
Timothy, 3:12 is written that, All that will live
godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution. So,
you must expect tribulations and afflictions if you desire
the Kingdom of God; and the Savior tells you to pray for
those who persecute you.
Resentment and Self-Justification
—The first thing that sickens the soul is
self-justification. It is difficult for a person to suffer
"offense" in the world without holding the
person that caused it in disdain.
—Saint Isaac the Syrian says, "He
who can suffer offense and have it in his power to excuse
it attains the solace of God."4
—This is certainly true. And yet how would this be,
if instead of responding to offense with hate, you smiled
amicably at your persecutor and prayed for him?
A good Christian should not have enemies, by a small
measure of will and conduct. This is not just for his own
sake; if you know that someone suffers difficulty because
of you, go and ask his forgiveness, for if you are angry
with him also, then there will be two people clothed in
hatred; and if you approach him with love, then perhaps
you will win him over and you both will gain peace.
God told you to forgive, for then you also will be
forgiven.5 Who among us does
not need forgiveness? Then why should you be deprived
of it and justify yourself, when you know that God
gives the greatest forgiveness, as only He knows the
heart of man? Therefore, give God truth and offerings,
and your soul will in this way gain peace.
Zeal for God
—If your soul gains peace, try now to have zeal for
God. Speak to Him as much as possible and follow the
commandments that He gave you to attain life eternal.
Struggle in fasting and in prayer, For without me ye
can do nothing.6 Thus, as much as
possible, we will follow the fasts because through them
we make ourselves holy. We are not killers of the body;
however, the body needs to be humble and attune itself
to fasting and acts of moral courage in order to heal
the soul.
We cannot do this without a spiritual father. When a
person goes to his spiritual father and weeps for his
sins, confessing them since the time of his childhood, he
becomes a spiritually healthy person. If you become
healthy, you can no longer remain indifferent to the
spiritual anguish of others. For the love of your neighbor
you must try to save his soul.
It is necessary, however, to have discretion, for Christ
said, Neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest
they trample them under their feet, and turn again and
rend you (Matt. 7:6). Therefore, you must be
extremely wise, as wise as serpents, in order to be able
to gather other souls both for the sake of Christ as well
as for their own salvation.
—"To see your neighbor is to see
God," said Saint Clement of
Alexandria...
—Yes. It is as I said earlier about the image of God
in man. Or as the Fathers have said, "Salvation will
come to you from your neighbor, but so also will
condemnation."
If you go to a spiritual father and hide no sins from him
(nor from God), and if you follow the canons, you will
find your way to the Kingdom of Heaven. But it is
necessary to feel sorry about your sins, or else you will
not receive forgiveness from God. However, if you remain
in a spiritual connection with your spiritual father and
strive to follow his guidance, you will have a healthy
soul and zeal for holiness.
One must make sure that no sins remain unconfessed,
because in the world, in the churches of this world, the
sacrament of repentance is extremely difficult to fulfill.
This is because there are many Christians, few priests,
and even fewer spiritual fathers. Therefore, the spiritual
father does not have enough time to explore the soul of
the Christian, and the latter may return home with
unconfessed sins (committed in ignorance, for example). In
times past, people had notebooks in which they recorded
their sins so that they would not forget them during
confession, and now, after communism has taken its turn on
these poor people, this healthy custom has been completely
lost.
Penance
—I recall that Father Iustin
(Pârvu) also mentioned this custom. I want to ask
you, Father: is it possible to confess while one is under
penance and when it is not permitted to receive
communion?
—Of course. If your conscience is nagging you
because of a sin you committed, run quickly to your
spiritual father and confess. Do not sit in sin and
moreover do not put off repentance. It is written in the
Book of Revelation 21:27, that in the city Shall in no
wise enter into it any thing that defileth, neither
whatsoever worketh abomination, or maketh a lie!
—And what it happens if you have
received a penance, and you die without having received
the Eucharist, and without having fulfilled the penance?
What happens to the soul?
—It is saved. As long as it is under penance and is
fulfilling the penance, it is forgiven its sins.
However… I read once in a country newspaper about a
nun in Bessarabia who had fallen painfully to the ground
when she was putting on her shoes, and spent many days in
a faint, or possibly in a coma. In any case, she did not
die, because her heart was beating properly. When she came
to, she told the entire community how the former abbess
had met her in a wonderful place, and confessed to her
that she had not been there from the very beginning, but
the prayers of the nuns had brought her to this status
within six weeks from her death. The abbess had died
without having recently received the Eucharist and only
the prayers of the community brought her to this blessed
place.
—That means that even those who die
while under penance are not sent directly to the place
where they should go—to "a place of brightness,
where all sickness, sorrow, and sighing, have
fled"?
—He can enter there only by the prayers of the
Church, of those who remain among the living. I meet many
fathers who, facing death, ask us, "Pray for
me!" Maybe it is so. God knows. But a person who is
spiritually healthy has is mercy for every soul, and he
wants that all might enter the Kingdom of God, and thus he
prays for his brothers as he would for himself—even
more so! Apostle James says: Pray one for
another, 7 and Saint Paul
says that we should pray without ceasing.8
A Word
– Will you give us a word for the
benefit of our souls, father?
– Well, as advice I will remind you of the words of
the Apostle James, a kinsman of the Lord, who said,
Know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity
with God? Whosoever therefore will be a friend of the
world is the enemy of God (James 4:4). It depends on
you, whose friend you want to become.
Lumea Credinţei
01 / 09 / 2014
1 The February birthday of the elder—he was born on February 8, 1926.
2 Lev. 11:44.
3 See: 1 Thess. 5:17.
4 See: Saint Isaac the Syrian, The Ascetical Homilies of Saint Isaac the Syrian, Homily 57.
5 See: Luke 6:37.
6 See: John 15:5.
7 James 5:16.
8 See: 1 Thess. 5: 17.
2 Lev. 11:44.
3 See: 1 Thess. 5:17.
4 See: Saint Isaac the Syrian, The Ascetical Homilies of Saint Isaac the Syrian, Homily 57.
5 See: Luke 6:37.
6 See: John 15:5.
7 James 5:16.
8 See: 1 Thess. 5: 17.
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